I know Wurmple's deal. I want nothing to do with it. Sorry. Don't care. Beautifly and Dustox do not interest me. I just want to find something in the wild that isn't--
OOH! OOOOOOOH! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GEORGLOPEZ!!!!!!!
Just in case you all forgot from "Return to Red", the whole inspiration for me starting this blog series was the GameGrumps series on Pokemon Emerald. If you haven't seen it, please do. It's amazing. You'll also notice their choice of character name; that was my little tribute to them.
Episode 1. There's plenty of them. They didn't finish, which is sad. Tell them to finish.
Watch this and tell me them not finishing isn't a tragedy.
Lotad, lvl 3
Gender: Male
Nature: Impish
Ability: Rain Dish
HP: 15
Attack: 7
Defense: 7
Special Attack: 6
Special Defense: 8
Speed: 7
Alright, what else can I catch out here--
Wait.
Wait a goddamn minute.
Is this for real?
Is this fucking for real?!?!
Oh...you KNOW I have to catch this! I've never used one, but from what I've heard about it, I need one.
Ralts, lvl 4
Gender: Female
Nature: Hasty
Ability: Synchronize
HP: 16
Attack: 7
Defense: 6
Special Attack: 9
Special Defense: 8
Speed: 8
Oh...it only knows Growl until Level 6? Fucking well played, GameFreak...well played.
Also...I kind of wanted a male. It would be cool if I could get a Gallade out of this, but this is only Gen-III, and that shit ain't happening yet. Honestly though, this thing comes as a male? That seems so cruel...and I kind of liked that.
It's really late and I have to get to bed, but I have a serious beef with this game, now that I have to train multiple Pokemon.
Look at this screen-capture and tell me what's wrong with it:
Do you see the problem? No? Look very closely then.
Still no? Well, what if we played a different game...say, Gen-II Gold?
What is different (besides the obvious graphical advances) between these two battle screens?
I'll give you some space to think.
...
...
...
...
...
...
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...
Look at the layout of the battle actions.
They swapped the Pokemon menu with the Item menu.
Small change, right?
DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY FUCKING TIMES I'VE GONE INTO THE BAG, BACKED OUT, GONE BACK INTO THE BAG, ALL TRYING TO SWAP MY POKEMON OUT, BECAUSE THE MENU LAYOUT BECAME INSTINCTUAL?!?!?!?!
A THOUSAND FUCKING TIMES IS THE RIGHT ANSWER!!!!
Why...why would you do this to me? Why would you get me to play a game so often that the menu layout is ingrained in my subconscious, make a sequel that works off the same layout, but then fuck me like that in the third installment?!?! I...it makes me so sad...
Torchic, lvl 9
Wingull, lvl 7
Poochyena, lvl 6
Ralts, lvl 6
Lotad, lvl 3
Pokedex: 5, Badges: 0
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